Compassionate Self-Discipline, and Why All Self-Discipline is NOT the Same

Here's a Healthier, More Productive Way to Think About It That Will Make Great Habits Easier to Sustain

Too many people go to the gym simply because they hate themselves. In direct opposition to this, I teach something that I call compassionate self-discipline, which is a much healthier, more realistic, and more empowering way to look at achieving your goals and becoming happier.

The idea is transformative, for sure, but it also calls for you to maintain two different, conflicting ideas in your head at the same time. 

Most people have difficulty with this, but it’s not impossible, and it will change how you think about self-discipline forever. 

The first idea that you need to plant firmly inside your mind is that there is nothing “wrong” with you at all.

Forgive the amateur poetry, but you are every bit a perfect, astonishing miracle of nature as a bright cloud formation in a clear blue sky, as an imposing mountainside bursting upward through the solid earth, or as the infinitude of blistering stars above. You are perfect in every way. 

And yet…

And yet, if we’re being honest (let’s please be honest), you could also use a little bit of improvement. 

You aren’t exactly “finished,” are you? 

There are certain things about yourself that you would like to change or feel as though you “should” change, and you’re probably right. There is work to be done!

Image: Pixabay

How to Improve on Perfection

You are imperfectly perfect, and moving forward with this idea is the key to achieving radical self-discipline, and transforming your life.

Once you understand this, you’ll be able to read books and listen to podcasts because you’re curious and interested in the world, not because you think you’re dumb.

You’ll go to the gym because you love yourself and you want to expand the capabilities of your miraculous body, not because you’re trying to live up to some ego-ideal or to some image of what someone else says that you “should” look like.

This kind of radical, positive self-discipline changes everything. 

I don’t hear anybody else talking about this, but everyone absolutely should. It forms the cornerstone of my achievement philosophy, and I want to ensure that everyone understands the truth behind what I’m saying: You CAN improve upon perfection, and it’s a hell of a lot of fun trying.

We’re not trying to “catch up” to some external ideal of who we should become, but rather we’re forging ahead because we enjoy the challenge; we enjoy the process and the results, and our whole life is a joy because we’ve detached ourselves from relying on those results for our self-esteem or our happiness. 

Image: Pixabay

It Doesn’t Make the Process Easier

I just want to be clear on something before I go any further. This new, positive kind of self-discipline doesn’t make the reps easier or the struggle more bearable. 

It’s not permission to slack off or let yourself off the hook once you’ve made a commitment. You’re still required to do the work.

You will still be asked to give everything for what you’ve chosen to direct yourself toward — the improvement that you wish to make in your life — but the difference will be the attitude behind it.

You will now be “playing on your own team” — on your own side, as it were — and treating yourself as though you were someone you were responsible for helping. Like the way you’d treat a really terrific friend that you loved and wanted to see succeed. 

You wouldn’t want them to give up, and you wouldn’t want them to fail, but you’d want them to give it everything they’ve got — you’d want to see EFFORT, DRIVE, and an unshakeable COMMITMENT.

That’s what compassionate self-discipline is all about, and that’s a key part of my message (if I could be said to have one). 

It’s not necessarily “easier” to follow this path, but it’s a hell of a lot healthier and your results will improve dramatically as well, now that you’re actually working with yourself instead of berating yourself all the time and focusing on where you still fall short.

Photo by Author

I Also Do the Same Things That I’m Asking YOU to Do

This is how I live my life as well. I think it’s incredibly important never to lie to yourself, and so I never tell myself that I’m doing really well when I’m not, or that I’m succeeding where I could actually be doing much better.

I know exactly what is “wrong” with my body, my finances, my relationships, my vision, and my lifestyle, and I never try to sugarcoat my situation. I advise people to do the same. 

I’m asking for a lot of intellectual gymnastics from you right now because I think you can handle it. You can hold those two ideas in your head at the same time without totally believing one or the other, and you can move forward on your goals with dignity and grace, never rushing and yet never stopping, never getting too down on yourself and never thinking that you don’t need to push through that last rep. 

But I’m here with you in the same way that I’m asking you to be there with yourself, and that’s why I’m going to help as much as possible with your ongoing development. 

To do this, I’ve started my own Substack publication called The Competitive Advantage, and I’d like to invite you to join. 

There’s a free version and a premium version, but with both, you’ll get my absolute best. It’s just that the premium version comes with more of my best. 

Each week, you’ll get 1 new article related to self-improvement and self-discipline; you’ll get weekly progress/accountability reports from me so you know that I’m working as hard as you are; you’ll also get weekly motivational videos, as well as links to the best of what I’m reading and watching that can really help you as well.

Most importantly, you’ll be part of an incredibly supportive community, led by me, that will never give up on you and will support you as you set out to crush your most audacious goals. 

You can also email me directly with any questions or comments that you have, and I will help you personally. 

For those of you who may be just hearing about me, I’m a professional writer and fitness model from Canada who has read more than 1,000 books in the last eight years and reached financial independence by cultivating about a dozen different income streams. 

Photo by Author

When I’m not at the gym, I’m on the road in my Porsche and headed to the library or off to some outdoor adventure! I love being alive — and expanding my own possibilities — and I do everything I can to help other people enjoy being alive as well. 

So join my new Substack, and let’s walk this path of compassionate self-discipline together. There are other paths, but this is a path with heart. As Carlos Castaneda used to say, one should always follow the path with heart.

All the best,

Matt Karamazov